Description
Life is full of turning points. Sometimes we stay in the same routine, in the same job, relationship, or lifestyle, because it feels safe. But deep down, we might wonder—is this really where I’m meant to be? This book encourages us to explore that feeling and helps us decide when it’s time to stay and when it’s time to go. It offers practical tools and simple wisdom to help navigate change with confidence and peace.
Imagine your life as a house. Every part of your life—a job, a relationship, a community—can be seen as a room. Some rooms feel warm and comforting. Others feel too small or empty. Sometimes, even when a room once felt like home, we begin to outgrow it. The first step is simply to notice. What do these rooms make you feel? Are you thriving or stuck? At peace or restless?
To make sense of all this, we’re given a tool called “pointing and calling.” It means we pause and clearly name what we’re experiencing. Point to what’s happening in your life. Call it out honestly. Are you fulfilled? Or just afraid of change? This mindful check-in helps bring hidden truths to light.
Sometimes the decision to leave a room is painful—especially if we’ve spent years there. But change isn’t failure. Growth often requires us to let go. Another helpful idea is to recognize the kind of ending we’re facing. Is it chosen, sudden, or gradual? Understanding the type of ending helps us move through it with greater ease and less confusion.
To find our direction, the book invites us to listen to two guideposts: our spiritual personality and our core values. Your spiritual personality is your unique way of connecting with something deeper—what brings you peace, wonder, and meaning. Your core values are the principles you hold dear—like honesty, kindness, or justice. These two things form your compass. When you’re unsure what to do, return to them. If a room doesn’t align with these guideposts, it may be time to move on.
But what happens after you leave a room?
That’s where the hallway comes in. Hallways are the in-between spaces in life. After a job ends, a breakup, or a major move, we find ourselves here—not quite sure what’s next. It’s tempting to rush through this part. But the hallway is important. It’s where we clear our heads, ask questions, and find clarity.
Discernment is the name for this quiet, thoughtful process. It’s not about rushing to an answer. It’s about listening—really listening—to what you need, what you believe, and where you feel called. It’s also about recognizing fear. Not all fear is bad. Sometimes fear signals growth. Other times, it shows we’re avoiding something we must face. The book teaches us to tell the difference.
To stay grounded in this uncertain space, we can use simple tools like mantras and breath prayers. One powerful phrase is “for now.” If you’re waiting for clarity, repeat this gently: “For now, I will wait.” If you’re scared but ready to step forward, try: “Let in what is. Let go what isn’t.” These small phrases help settle your mind and bring you back to the present.
Hallways can feel lonely. But they’re often where the most transformation happens. It’s okay not to have all the answers yet. What matters is that you stay open, honest, and kind to yourself.
Eventually, a door will appear. A new room will call to you. But before you walk in, ask: Am I ready to lead and to listen?
When we enter new spaces, we carry our past experiences with us. We’ve grown. We’ve learned. We’re more aware of who we are. This time, we enter as someone who knows their boundaries, their values, and their voice.
But even as we grow into leaders, we must also stay humble and present. Listening is just as important as speaking. Sometimes, our bodies tell us more than our minds. Are you feeling excited butterflies? Or the heavy weight of anxiety? Learning to trust these signals helps us move with wisdom.
There’s also a trap we need to avoid—people-pleasing. Trying to make everyone happy might seem kind, but it keeps us from living authentically. True belonging only happens when we stop hiding and show up as ourselves—imperfect, honest, and whole.
As the author shares from her personal journey, the decision to leave her longtime church was not easy. It came after reflection, conversations, and sitting with discomfort. But once she stepped out, she began searching for her next spiritual home.
That search led her to a Quaker meetinghouse. There, she found peace in the silence, in the stillness, in the sense of shared presence. There was no rush, no loud declarations—only quiet listening and respectful sharing. It was unlike anything she had known. But it felt right. The values of simplicity, compassion, and thoughtful reflection aligned with her inner guideposts.
This new room didn’t offer all the answers. But it offered space. It offered a kind of spiritual quiet that allowed her to be fully present and fully herself. And that’s what this book encourages you to find too—not a perfect room, but a true one.
So, as you face big choices in your life—whether to leave or stay, to pause or move forward—remember this:
You are allowed to ask questions.
You are allowed to wait.
You are allowed to change your mind.
And most importantly, you are allowed to grow.
Use the tools shared here—reflection, breath, clarity, values—and trust the process. Your life is a journey from one room to the next. Some rooms will be temporary, others long-lasting. But every room you enter can teach you something.
Let go of what no longer serves you.
Rest in the hallway when you need to.
And when the time comes, walk forward with courage, grace, and self-trust.
